Ha ha ha! Suckers!

What a thing of beauty! No one expected me, The Grey Goose, to cash in my "Money In the Bank" guarantee to take the championship!

How they all fought so hard, spending every last bit of energy to beat each other senseless. And when all was said and done, Hamster emerged from the steel cage victorious, barely able to stand under his own power. And that was when I struck! My Wings of Wrath were more than enough to put the Hamstermaniac down for the count. Now I am the champion of the world!

There are those who might say that I stole the belt, but I say that's just jealousy. I won the title fair and square by outsmarting everyone else.

All hail The Grey Goose and the beginning of his glorious reign as World Champion! Goose power!

Rage in the Cage!!!

Live, this Sunday, on Pay Per View, the World Wrestling Corporation presents a Fatal Four-Way Steel Cage match for the Heavyweight Championship of the world!

Watch as the Flying Ferret defends the title against three fearsome opponents: Hamster the Hamstermaniac, Captain Turtle, and Muskrat the Giant!

Special guest referees Bucky "The Intimidator" Beaver and The Marvelous Mongoose will be on hand to call the match.

Don't miss the wrestling event of the century! Sunday, Sunday, Sunday, live on Pay Per View!

Be there!

The Hamstermaniac don't care who the referee is!

Either way, brother, it's gonna be me walking out of the arena with that title.

So bring it on, whoever you want. Beaver, Mongoose, Alligator, Emu, Platypus, nothin' is gonna stop the Hamster from running wild! And once I get that belt around my waist, there aint gonna be no takin' me down.

Hamstermania will live forever!

Ferret lies!!!!

Muskrat is not friends with Beaver, Muskrat hate Beaver! Beaver betrayed Muskrat and stole Muskrat's mate. Muskrat want revenge on Beaver!

Muskrat thinks Ferret is friends with Mongoose! Muskrat has seen Ferret whispering with Mongoose and being sneaky. Ferret is always sneaky! Don't let sneaky Ferret have sneaky friend Mongoose as referee!

Muskrat is strongest!

This is an outrage!

With all due respect, Chairman Rabbit, I must disagree with your choice of guest referee for the title match that you so ably created.

I happen to know that the Beaver has been in cahoots with the Muskrat for quite some time, and I'll be darned if I'm going to let myself be cheated from a fair defense of my championship.

Please consider a more partial guest referee to ensure that things stay on the up and up. Might I suggest The Marvelous Mongoose? He has a fine reputation for being true and fair. I feel that he would be a perfect choice to officiate such an important event.

Now hold on just a minute!

I'm the Chairman around here, and as the boss I get to make the matches.

You've all made some good points about why you deserve a shot at the title. So I'm here tonight to announce that live, this Sunday, there will be a fatal four-way match for the world championship belt!

Futhermore, it is my great pleasure to reveal the special guest referee for this historic match - none other than 17-time world champion Bucky "The Intimidator" Beaver!

You have less than a week to prepare, gentlemen. May the best creature win.

Not if I have anything to say about it!

Poor Muskrat, your memory is as spotty as your skill in the ring. Let us not forget that it was I who bested you in our match before you were so cravenly attacked from behind by that infernal Ferret at Wrestlemania. If anyone deserves a shot at the title, it is Captain Turtle.

Foolish Ferret, your flying back-breaker will prove useless against my rock like shell. I will wear you down with my legendary patience and make you tap out with my figure four leg lock. The fans will scream the name Captain Turtle as I rightfully claim the championship belt!

I put forth this decree to all future challengers: Captain Turtle does not back down from a fight. I plan on defending the championship belt until the day I decide to step down. Flying Ferret, I demand that you step into the ring so that I may claim what is mine.

MUSKRAT IS STRONGEST!!!

Stupid Hamster and Ferret think they so tough, but Muskrat will SMASH!

Sneaky Ferret hit Muskrat from behind in locker room before Wrestlemania. Muskrat should be champion, not Ferret! Muskrat challenges Ferret to match, Muskrat deserves belt more than Hamster! Muskrat will destroy Ferret, then destroy Hamster! Then Muskrat will be king!

Come out and fight weak little Ferret. Muskrat guarantee you lose!

The Flying Ferret fears no one!

I have heard your challenge, Hamster, and I tell you this: I fight who I want, when I want! You can stomp and sputter all you like, but the simple truth is that I am the champion and I will defend my title when I decide a worthy opponent has come forward.

It was a delicious moment, humiliating you in front of all of your pea-brained "Hamstermaniacs" at Wrestlemania. Oh how they cried for their fallen hero when I split your head open with that steel chair. The look of utter shock and defeat on your face is one I shall cherish forever.

You may have the brawn, Hamster, but the brains clearly belong to me. If I were to grant you your precious rematch it would only serve as a reminder that I am indeed the greatest of all time, and that you are not suited to so much as polish my boots.

There will be no match today, Hamster, but perhaps if I am feeling charitable in the future I may allow another comic attempt on your part to pin me and reclaim the belt. Until that day, I shall remain content with my superiority, no matter how many challenges your foul mouth may utter.

Whatchoo gonna do when the Hamster runs wild on you, brother?

Last weekend at Wrestlemania I was embarrassed by the cowardly actions of the Flying Ferret. I'm here to tell you now, brother, that I plan on settling the score tonight right here in this ring!

I'm calling you out, Ferret, me and the pythons are gonna make you wish you never left your momma's den. You stole that championship belt from me and I will be taking it back!

I'm going to stomp you 'till you squeal, brother. I'm going to slap you into next week. I will send you to the hospital with my atomic leg drop, and that's a guarantee.

So get out here and take your medicine, Ferret, or are you too gutless to face me like a rodent? One thing is for sure, Hamstermania is alive and well, brother! Come and get some!