Ha ha ha! Suckers!

What a thing of beauty! No one expected me, The Grey Goose, to cash in my "Money In the Bank" guarantee to take the championship!

How they all fought so hard, spending every last bit of energy to beat each other senseless. And when all was said and done, Hamster emerged from the steel cage victorious, barely able to stand under his own power. And that was when I struck! My Wings of Wrath were more than enough to put the Hamstermaniac down for the count. Now I am the champion of the world!

There are those who might say that I stole the belt, but I say that's just jealousy. I won the title fair and square by outsmarting everyone else.

All hail The Grey Goose and the beginning of his glorious reign as World Champion! Goose power!

Rage in the Cage!!!

Live, this Sunday, on Pay Per View, the World Wrestling Corporation presents a Fatal Four-Way Steel Cage match for the Heavyweight Championship of the world!

Watch as the Flying Ferret defends the title against three fearsome opponents: Hamster the Hamstermaniac, Captain Turtle, and Muskrat the Giant!

Special guest referees Bucky "The Intimidator" Beaver and The Marvelous Mongoose will be on hand to call the match.

Don't miss the wrestling event of the century! Sunday, Sunday, Sunday, live on Pay Per View!

Be there!

The Hamstermaniac don't care who the referee is!

Either way, brother, it's gonna be me walking out of the arena with that title.

So bring it on, whoever you want. Beaver, Mongoose, Alligator, Emu, Platypus, nothin' is gonna stop the Hamster from running wild! And once I get that belt around my waist, there aint gonna be no takin' me down.

Hamstermania will live forever!

Whatchoo gonna do when the Hamster runs wild on you, brother?

Last weekend at Wrestlemania I was embarrassed by the cowardly actions of the Flying Ferret. I'm here to tell you now, brother, that I plan on settling the score tonight right here in this ring!

I'm calling you out, Ferret, me and the pythons are gonna make you wish you never left your momma's den. You stole that championship belt from me and I will be taking it back!

I'm going to stomp you 'till you squeal, brother. I'm going to slap you into next week. I will send you to the hospital with my atomic leg drop, and that's a guarantee.

So get out here and take your medicine, Ferret, or are you too gutless to face me like a rodent? One thing is for sure, Hamstermania is alive and well, brother! Come and get some!