Sim games coming soon to a store near you

Sim Crackhead
Players take on the exciting task of scoring that next rock, be it by stealing, killing, or prostituting themselves. Maintain your crack den and avoid the police for hours of educational fun!

Sim Sandwich
You make the decisions! Ham? Bologna? One slice or two? What kind of bread? The combinations are limitless!

Sim Veal Calf
Don't struggle in your dark pen too much or you will lose points on your deliciousness factor. Better slurp down more of that formula, anemia equals game over!

Sim Celebrity Handler
Uh oh, Lindsey accidentally flashed her hoo-ha again! Careful, Nicole is about to crumble into dust! Watch out, Paris just swallowed a whole bottle of Laxatives! Are you up to the challenge?

Sim Blogger
Crazy ranting about 9/11 or banal minutiae about your hangnail? Sit obsessively for hours formulating fantastic theories about every IP address logged into your stat tracker. Fight the temptation to click your own Google ads. You'll be famous one day - or will you?