Erotic SlashFic Story Time: Forbidden Fruit

Captain Planet involuntarily tensed and breathed a deep sigh as Big Bird ran his beak along the exposed flesh of his back. "You've been fighting polluters all day," the yellow stud whispered. "Maybe it's time you let someone else take control."
"I must be vigilant in protecting Gaia," the blue hero replied with closed eyes. "I can't let my guard down, even for a second."
"Relax, you're in Big Bird's hands now."
The two secret lovers embraced, bodies entwined before the harsh shadows cast by the roaring campfire. The forest outside of their little cave was quiet and still, but the force of their passion masked the sound of the approaching visitor.
"You feathered whore!" shrieked the cloaked figure.
"Starbuck!" Big Bird yelped in shock. "I thought you were still stationed on Galactica?"
"I followed you in the Stealth Viper. I just knew you wouldn't be able to keep your beak out of his shorts!"
Big Bird sobbed with shame. "I'm so sorry. I love you with all my heart, Cara." He turned his gaze to Captain Planet, who looked hurt. "But I love him too. Oh why can't the heart ever be happy?!?"
Starbuck's demeanor softened, and she moved to comfort the crying bird. Without warning, a booming voice interrupted the tender scene. "We have no time for your piddling affairs!" It was Teddy Roosevelt, back from space in the mech suit that Alexander Graham Bell designed to combat the Silfresian Horde invasion that nearly destroyed the solar system. "I have need for volunteers to fight a new threat. As Earth's greatest heroes, I call on you all to stand up and fight!"
"Yes Sir!" Captain Planet exclaimed enthusiastically. "What's the problem?"
Teddy grew suddenly grave. "I'm afraid it's the worst crisis mankind has ever faced...."

What is the epic danger that has Teddy worried so? Will our heroes save the day once more? Will Big Bird and Captain Planet ever be able to enjoy their love without admonishment? Find out next week on: Erotic SlashFic Story Time!